Parties and people

I had a meeting for my son's 1st grade holiday party. I took an idea for a craft that all the other mom's loved and I volunteered to make sugar cookies. I know. Why did I do that? Because I love to over involve myself. But one of the mom's might have her gallbladder out so I thought I'd take more of the burden.

Because of how some girls in high school treated me I have always been extra shy around other females. Men let things roll off their back like water on a duck so I'm more comfortable, that and I have, at times, a dirty sense of humor that men appreciate more.

But since having my kids I have vowed not to pass on to them my scars from my past. So I push myself into situations I would normally avoid and I have found something interesting out about myself, I enjoy myself. I know I'd love to have tons of friends but I'm gun-shy. Now I've decided that friends don't come knocking on my door looking for me so I need to put myself out there. I'm not a wall flower, I love to socialize and thrive around other people. I especially love to laugh and make others laugh. But through the years I've learned to fine tune my filter that keeps me from saying too much or saying something that can be misconstrued as it did in high school. Because it's fine tuned I have realized that I'm more comfortable in making new friends.

I count that as a triumph for me and a good example for my kids.